Are some of your relationships suffering because you haven’t taken the time to listen? Maybe it’s time to listen up! While we’re at it – how would you define Active Listening?
Life is so busy and constant that it’s easy to let our relationships with those closest to us slip down the list of priorities. Is that what you want?
No, of course not. But often we are trapped in habits that are so deeply ingrained that we aren’t even aware of what’s going on until it’s almost too late!
Do you come home and just “want some space”?
Do you find yourself sitting in front of the television, with your phone or iPad on your lap, mostly unaware of who else is in the room?
Do you answer text messages or phone calls straight away, even if you are sitting talking to someone else?
Do you ever have time when you don’t have your mobile phone or tablet/iPad with you?
Some of you might be feeling a bit nervous at this point. “Go without my phone – no way!!”
I was panicking today when I thought I’d lost my phone for about 30 minutes. I couldn’t find it anywhere. All the information I had stored on it. I couldn’t even remember any phone numbers to call!
It’s scary, isn’t it, how attached we’ve become to these devices that are supposed to make our lives easier! Well, it’s about time we questioned whether they really do.
Can you remember the last time you had a conversation with someone that wasn’t interrupted by a phone call or message?
Our phones & computers (of all shapes and sizes) have started to control our lives. Why? Because we’ve allowed them to.
We choose to allow our electronic devices to control us.
Do you believe that? I mean, who says you must answer that text message or phone call straight away. (Sure, there are always times when we need to acknowledge the urgency of some situations, but they are usually rare for most of us!)
Can you imagine what would happen to your relationships if you chose to focus on and listen to, the person you were with?
You can do this! Your friends and family would soon notice that you do listen and pay attention when you are with them. How do you manage this? By answering any messages/call when you’re alone.
My husband and I were given some great advice when we had young children. When we both got home from work, we were to make time to sit and listen to each other about what happened in our days.
The kids could be playing around us. Tea may not have even been started. But, this time was to be a priority!
We have continued to do this right through our married life. Sometimes it hasn’t been easy to do, but, it has helped our relationship immensely. We have chosen to invest in our relationship by listening to each other.
There’s no doubt that sometimes we do this better than others. But the fact that we know it is something we’re committed to, makes it easier to forgive the times when we haven’t.
So, how would I define active listening? To start with, it means letting go of the things that will stop us from listening. The things that will easily distract us – like our mobile phones, etc.
Active listening, among other things, means to choose to listen without allowing distractions to interfere.
Will you choose to actively listen to those around you?