How will we save the environment?  The problem is real.  We don’t need to go very far to see it, but the big question is “what can you do about it?”

I’m not saying that it’s all your problem and you alone have to fix it, but the truth is that every one of us needs to be accountable for the way we live our lives.  Are we a part of the problem in the way we live?

We have to be honest with ourselves.  As an individual on planet earth, we have the responsibility to maintain a lifestyle that does the least damage to our planet.

Where are you in the climate change / save the environment debates?  Your voice matters.  

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I know I have for too long.  I’ve tried over the years to “do my bit” but the truth is we’re all going to have to work harder to help our planet survive. 

I live in Australia where one of our greatest national treasures, the great barrier reef, is under threat.  Many of our treasured species are under threat of being endangered – e.g. the koala.  Check it out here:  https://www.wwf.org.au/what-we-do/species/koala#gs.9hhvn3

So, where do we start to make a difference?

I’m no expert, but these are some of the things that I’ve done to get started…

1. 1. Collect all the plastic packaging we use in a week and take it back to my supermarket where they have large bins to recycle plastic.

   2. Stop using plastic bags while shopping. It takes some getting used to – remembering to take your shopping bags with you, but it’s worth it.  There are numerous bags when you stop and think about it.  Bags to carry all your shopping; bags to put your produce into (instead of using their plastic bags); bags to carry your purchases from general shops (clothing; shoes; etc.)  But remember, use up what you already have.  If you can’t recycle any plastic bags that you have then use them over and over again. 

   3. Buy products in bulk. I started buying the double length toilet paper and buy this in bulk.  It saves on some of the plastic they wrap them in.

   4. Stop buying water in plastic bottles. Buy a couple of environmentally friendly water bottles and refill these from your tap.  I have several.   One next to me when sleeping, working, etc. and a smaller one to fit in my bag while walking around.

   5. Invest in a good travel mug for your tea and coffee and use this instead of the disposable mugs.

   6. Check out the plastic containers you use for storage, etc. – again, don’t throw them out and buy more environmentally friendly ones.  But, when you need to get new ones, why not replace them with long lasting products that don’t harm the planet.

   7. I’ve stopped buying face wipes to cleanse my face. I got into the habit of using one of these every day without thinking how much this adds up to!  Instead just use a cleanser with water or, like me, you can invest in something like Face halo makeup removers.  They’re not cheap, but you can use them over and over again as they can be washed in your washing machine. 

These are all pretty obvious things that we still have to choose to do.  What do you do to save the environment? I love to hear what others do to save the planet and am inspired to try these ideas as well.  

Let’s share any ideas you have or what you already do in the comment section.  Your ideas will help others to find ways to reduce waste.  It’s a great way to work together and encourage each other to do our best to protect our environment. 

How would you answer the question – “How real are you?” or, “Are you for real?”

I live in a beautiful, sunburnt country, Australia and we Aussies are often described as being able to smell “bull” a mile away (I’m being polite!). We know when someone is “putting on an act” and not being real.  While this makes life very uncomfortable for any politician in our country, it hasn’t been a bad trait to have.  I think it’s true to say that we’ve all become experts at hiding our real self and what goes on inside of us. 

Think about it for a minute.  How much of today, have you felt comfortable enough to;

• be able to contribute freely to conversations around you?
• speak about things that really matter to you?
• or tell someone what is going on inside of you?

We all know that there are times when it is best not to share what’s going on inside – when it’s not a safe environment to do so, or when you have other responsibilities that you need to fulfil.  (We’ve all come across people who don’t have very good “filters” and they tell everybody everything about their lives – appropriate or not!  This isn’t a healthy way to live.) There is a time and a place for everything.

But the question all of us need to answer is: How much of your life is spent hiding behind a facade that protects your real self – all of your thoughts, feelings, etc.  And how often do you allow others to see the real you?  How real are you?

I can’t stress enough that there are times when “being totally real” could be a bad idea as those around you may not understand where you are coming from and hurt you with their glib, unthinking responses. 

But having said this, we do need to stop periodically and ask ourselves how we’re going below the surface.   Are we living life the way we long to?  Do we share a deeper part of our life with those we trust?  Some people are good at re-evaluating their lives and where they are at.  For others, not so much.

For example, how would you go answering the following questions:

• How much of today were you able to speak your mind freely or did you find yourself having to suppress what you really thought?
• When was the last time that you were in touch with your feelings?
• How would you describe what you are feeling right now? Happy; sad; frustrated; overwhelmed; uncertain; tired….
• What would your life look like if you were living a life you loved?

My intention isn’t to frustrate you by asking these questions, but it is to help you to get in touch with your inner self. 

We all have responsibilities that need to be met to be able to live – work to bring in a wage; care for our families; prepare meals; etc.  But how different would your life look if you were doing these things being more in touch with your real self?  

Often, it isn’t our intention to bury our true selves deep inside. We’ve had to do it to be safe; to ensure that people can’t hurt us.  But, at what cost? 

My life isn’t what I thought it would be.  I have lived with a chronic illness for almost 30 years.  I often try to hide what I’m feeling from others so that I don’t have to live with their reaction to it.  Sometimes, that is a conscious choice – I feel too tired and weak to talk about it.  But other times, I do it because it’s automatic – it’s what I’m used to doing. 

Occasionally, I like to look at my life from a different perspective, to help me to see more clearly and not become stagnant or stuck.

Do you remember those Magic Eye Illusions, or stereo-grams – where you look at the image and make your eyes go slightly unfocused so that you can see the picture inside the picture?  Sometimes I think life is like that.  We need to look at what is behind the surface image to see what’s going on.

Reflecting on other people’s experiences and thoughts is one tool that challenges me about how I want to live my life. 

Below are a few quotes that I found helpful to reflect on.  As you read them think about how they speak to you and how they might help you be real.

“Whatever you are, be a good one.” Abraham Lincoln.

“Don’t complain about things you’re not willing to change.” Curiano.com

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.  In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”  Victor Frankl

“I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.”  Stephen Covey

“Stop being afraid of what could go wrong, and start being excited of what could go right.” Tony Robbins

  These certainly make me think about how I’m living my life.  I want to love this life I have and keep on becoming the best I can be.  How about you?   

I came across a fantastic quote on Pinterest the other day which really resonated with me. 

“If you rearrange the letters in Depression you get “I pressed on” –

meaning your current situation is not your final destination.”

 (from The Wellness Way – Rockford)

If you’ve experienced depression in your life, I’m sure you’ve discovered at some time or another that it’s not simple to “press on” when you are feeling down.  Life seems to have a grey tinge to it all and your focus is firmly stuck on yourself.  No-one understands what life is like for you – or at least that’s how it feels.

It may “feel like” one of the hardest things you could do, but actually pressing on, one step at a time, towards a goal that is meaningful to you, will be an enormous help in moving out of the dark fog to a life that you can love. 

I don’t say these words lightly.  I know it’s hard to shift your focus when you are stuck in a depressed state.  But I also know that when I feel like this, I long to be able to find something that will give me a purpose and to start moving towards it.

Here’s a list of 5 things you can do to help you to move forward:

1. Set yourself a “mini” goal – something you want to do but haven’t been able to while your feelings have been in control of your life.A mini goal is just that – something small, but something you can say “well done” to yourself for doing it.  For example:

1. • go for a walk – if you’re up to walking around the block, do that – but if that feels too much, then just go for a 5 to10 minute walk around your home & backyard.

• • go to Headspace.com and do a short meditation. It’s free to try it out, so go on line and choose a meditation to do now.  Commit yourself to doing one each day.

• • Spend 5 to10 minutes brainstorming ideas of things you would really love to do. This is brainstorming, so just write down a list of the ideas that come into your head.

These are just a few ideas to get you started.  You can probably think of many more.

2. Speak to someone that you know will listen to and help you…someone that has your best in mind. This may be a friend; a family member; or a Counsellor. 

If you’d rather speak to someone that you won’t be running into every day, then a Counsellor is the best person.  Being able to open up to someone and share what you’re feeling and thinking, is the best place to start bringing about change in your life.  

3. Ask someone close to you to help keep you accountable. Sometimes this may be checking in on you a couple of times a week and asking how you’re going.  Ask this person to make sure that you answer the question without just brushing it off! 

I don’t know about you, but I’m an expert at saying “I’m okay, thanks” and doing what I can to move the conversation on – away from me! 

But we do need to have those people who will ask the question again “so how are you really?” and wait until you tell the truth about your world.

4. On a day when you are able to think clearly – brainstorm something that you would love to do that will take some planning. It might be something you’d like to do for somebody else; a place you’d like to go to; an experience you’d love to try. 

When you have an idea, draw up a plan outlining every step you need to take to achieve it.  Then next to each step, write a date that you will do it by. 

The most important thing here is to be realistic.  Some of the tasks may be bigger than others and take more time.  You may need to break these tasks down even further, so that it is reasonable for you to achieve each step in one go. 

5. If your depression is ongoing, you would be wise to go and speak to a health professional and discuss whether you may need to try medication to help to regulate it. Find a Doctor that you trust and can open up to. 

These steps may seem insignificant to some, but to others they may seem like a mountain to climb while they battle depression. 

One of the most important things that I have learned in my life is that I need to have a focus outside of myself.

If all that I am focussing on is myself then I find my life becomes meaningless.  But when I have something to focus on outside of myself – by helping somebody; learning new skills that may help me and others in the future; by loving others – then my life seems so much bigger and clearer. 

So, what is it you want to press on to?  Where would you like to see yourself in a week, month, a year or ten years’ time?   You can reach it by taking one step at a time… 

Short-tempered and sharp with my words:  Sometimes, I’m not even aware that I’m stuck, but I do notice that I’m being very “short” with people in certain situations.  I “DON’T WANT TO” do whatever I have to do. 

When I  look behind at  those situations, I can see that I’m stuck, and I’m resentful of the position that I find myself in.  It can be as simple as not wanting to do what someone else expects me to do and yet feeling powerless to say so to the other person.

Here are seven things to do when you find that you are stuck and you don’t know how to change things:

1. Name what is happening for you in these moments I’m getting mad at work.  Or, I really hate having to……!   Or, I get so frustrated whenever someone comes around and… Whatever it is for you, name the feeling and/or the situation that is triggering this response from you.

2.  Ask yourself some questions:  

• Am I really stuck or is there something I can do about…..?
• What’s stopping me from moving forward in this situation?  Is there more than one thing?
• Are these feelings from the past or are they relevant from where I am now?

3.  If you can’t do anything about your situation straight away… make a commitment to yourself to work on it as soon as you are able to.  It’s not always possible to just walk out in some situations, (eg at work – you might lose your job and your wage!).  So, if it’s appropriate, stay where you are, but develop a plan to do something about it.  As soon as possible go for a short walk, or do some exercise – it’s amazing how this can help us.  It doesn’t get rid of the problem, but it helps us to cope with it better.

4.  Talk to someone you trust:  Sometimes the best thing we can do is talk over the situation with someone that you know will listen to you and be honest with you.  Tell them how you’re feeling and what you think the situation is.  Ask them for their perspective and if they see it differently or can offer any insights that might help you.

(It’s amazing that when you aren’t the one going through a situation, how clearly they can see what’s going on.   They don’t have the weight of the feelings that you’re carrying which get in the way of you being objective.) 

5.  Talk to a Counsellor / Psychologist  If you find yourself in situations where you’re stuck on a regular basis, then it’s time to get some professional help.  Friends are great to “bounce off of”, but if you want to get to the bottom of what is happening and develop a clear strategy of what to do when you find yourself stuck again, a counsellor, or psychologist is the best answer. 

If you haven’t seen one before, maybe check with your Doctor as to who they recommend.  Or seek out various practices near your home and see if they have a website and reviews, etc.  Or maybe ask your friends if they’ve found someone that they would recommend?  There are lots of options. 

Remember, though – if you don’t find the first person you go to helpful – if they’re not the right fit for you, – that’s okay.  Don’t give up, try someone else.

6.  Write down your action plan.  Write down the steps that you take to help you to move from being stuck to being able to make clear, helpful choices.  If you’re anything like me, you may find that you need to use this plan in several different areas of your life.  Having it written down in point form, with some of your reflections about the feelings and the situation, may help you in the future. 

Of course, some situations are bigger than others.  Be patient with yourself and acknowledge that you want to make changes and that it’s okay to ask for others to help you.

7. Give yourself a pat on the back…or whatever you do to celebrate the wins in your life. Being stuck is an incredibly uncomfortable place to be, especially when you feel like you are powerless to bring about change.  So, celebrate the work you’ve done and the choices you have made.

Well done!